The Cursed Keep (Part Two)

It was a fierce battle. The courtyard was filled with not just furry and clawed Worgen, but also with the spirits and souls of the former inhabitants of this Light-forsaken keep. I gulped, whispering a quick prayer to the Light. In the exact same moment, Fizzikz started to cackle like a maniac, together with his Imp. I was not the only one that was disturbed by this. Even my reckless brother seemed to be scared by this sudden impulse of a freak emotion.

“What in the name of my grandfather’s beard are you laughing about?!” I asked the warlock. He just looked at me, with the eyes of a possessed witch.

“It is somehow ironic, that those who struggled against Arugal taking over the keep now serve him for eternity. Just another proof that, in the need, it is always the evil that wins” There was a core of truth to his answer, I had to admit. I started to feel sorry for these humans, bonded to this place for eternity. Imagine the horror…

“Arugal might be the evil bad guy in this neighborhood, but there’s at least one Dwarf here that is even more evil than him!” Razgrimm yelled, and leaped into the courtyard. Fizzikz followed him, and Duriff made sure to gain the higher ground. I sighed, but smiled afterwards. You have to fight fire with fire. Maybe the evil in some of us was necessary to banish the greater evil in this world, and ultimately, bring salvation to not just Shadowfang Keep, but also the world.

We fought our way through the courtyard, past the stables and into the kitchen. Another commander of the Worgen awaited us there, but compared to Rethilgore he was nothing but a little scratch on my shield. After we plowed our way through the kitchen, we found ourselves in the dining hall, with at the end of the table the former owner of this keep: Baron Silverlaine. I recognized him immediately, and so did my companions, since we found a broken portrait of him as we entered the dining hall. We hoped to argue with the Baron, but he charged us immediately. I went into close combat with the nobleman, locking his scepter with my axe.

“Baron Silverlaine, we are here to aid you! We are here to break the bonds that hold you in this place!” But my yelling did no good. All I received was a stare from blank, dead eyes.

“No one can free me from this prison! No one ever did, and no one ever will! And now, you will share my grim fate!” He smacked his scepter against my cheek, and then right into my stomach. I stumbled, but could raise my shield before he hit me a third time. Razgrimm tried to attack the baron, but his attacks were parried, and soon he also lied on the ground. Silverlaine aimed for my brother’s head, and he would have brought a massive headache to the Dwarven thief, if it was not for a bolt of shadow energy from Fizzikz’ fingertips. The baron was pushed away, and glared towards the warlock.

“You! You use the same powers as Arugal! You serve him!” he yelled.

“Arugal is a lapdog compared to my powers!” was the cocky reply from Fizzikz’ mouth, seconds before another dark blast hit the Baron. Razgrimm and I were back on our feet, and charged Silverlaine, who was on his knees. Both of us raised our weapons, and delivered the final crush. Baron Silverlaine fell down on his face.

My fellowship had already left the dining hall, and from the hallway in front of us I could hear the howls of more Worgen, and Razgrimm yelling my name. I was about to leap up the stairs to the hallway, as I heard the voice of Silverlaine.

“W-wait…” I turned around, and saw that the baron tried to rise from the floor. I moved towards him, my axe in my right hand. You could never trust an undead creature, even if he was from noble origin.

“I cannot find rest, even if you slaughter Arugal. What holds me here is more than the magic of an insane archmage. My family…they were all slain by the wild and p-primitive Worgen. And I…I could not defend them…” A wail of despair came from the mouth of Silverlaine, a wail that brought me more than just goosebumps. I felt pity for this man, who fiercely fought me just minutes ago. Slowly, I kneeled beside him.

“What can I do to bring you piece, Baron Silverlaine?” He reached for his right ring finger, and pulled of an ornamented ring. Slowly, he gave it to me. I grabbed it with my thumb and index finger, and looked at it.

“This is the Silverlaine family seal. It has been passed down from generation to generation. But I could not pass it to my only son. He was torn to pieces in front of my eyes…” Again, a terrible wail echoed in the room.

“His grave…is just outside the keep, in the valley under the bridge. Bury the family seal there. Then, my son has still received this heirloom. And then…I can rest” I nodded, and stuffed the ring into my pocket.

“Baron Silverlaine, I shall release you from your horrifying prison. Do not be afraid…”

“Fear is something I already lost. Pride is all I have left…” He looked at me, with a slight smirk across his face.

“Now, go and hunt Arugal. Hunt him like the Worgen hunted me and my family!” I got up, and nodded. Then, Silverlaine’s eyes closed, and he sighed once more.

“Mugrimm! Get up here! We need you!” It was Razgrimm, and by the growls that came from the hallway, I could tell that he just tore the guts of some beast. I looked once more at the Baron, and then ran off towards the hallway…

This story is not over yet! Make sure to come back, and bring some sugar for Betsy with ye! She loves sugar!

May the Light guard you,

Mugrimm Frostbrew

The Cursed Keep (Part One)

Before I start my report about our attack on Shadowfang Keep, I have to say something: I finally own my own horse! Sponsored by the Cathedral of Light, I can now travel fast and quite comfortable through Azeroth on the back of Betsy. Yes, Betsy is her name. And don’t you dare to joke about that!

Anyway, this is my report on the events in Shadowfang Keep. For me, the cleansing of that demonic place was something personal: every place that has not yet been touched by the Light, is a place I should travel to. And the dark keep, towering over Pyrewood Village, is such a place. My brother Razgrimm joined me, of course, out of personal gain. Rumors of long-forgotten treasures got his attention, and so he and his swords joined me. Duriff, my beloved sister, came along just because she could not let her two brothers have all the fun. And finally, Fizzikz the warlock joined us too. Why? Well, none of us knows, but my money is on the demonic lecture he could find in the library of Arugal himself.

Indeed, Arugal. It is told that it was him who brought the twisted and wild Worgen to this world, and that he has gone mad after the fall of Dalaran, the fabulous city of wizards and magicians. Now, he is corrupted by his own insanity, and seeks nothing more than the ashes of what was once Silverpine Forest in his hands. Such an adversary is more than an excellent challenge to the Undersized Heroes, and thus we entered his keep, while the wails of ghosts and the howls of the Worgen echoed across the midnight sky…

We did, however, not expect to meet this former Archmage shortly after we entered. As we walked through the archway of the ruined castle, we witnessed with our own eyes how the wicked Arugal killed one of the Undead, and then disappeared with a manic laughter. The gate in front of us was locked, so we had to fight another way.
“Over here, an open door!” Razgrimm yelled, and blindly charged forward, just into the arms of a mixed group of Worgen and rabid wolves. A silent “oops” could be heard, just before claws clattered against cold steel. I knew what to do, and leaped in front of my brother, right in time to save him from a Worgen’s claw to his head. I fell, numbed by the attack, but got back to my feet. I stared into the eyes of the beast, and grinned.
“Raz, you know what time it is?” I asked. He nodded.
“I think it is…”
“BRAWLING TIME!!!” both of us yelled in excitement, and jumped on our foes. Fizzikz let out a maniac’s cackle, and weakened the wolves and worgens, while the young priestess Duriff kept an eye on our “medical” situation. But even she knows how to inflict pain, and so she used her more sinister divine powers to punish our enemies.

We smacked, sliced and brawled our way through something that looked like a kind of stables, until we came to a staircase leading down to some small prisons. One of them held a human, waving and screaming at us.
“Take care! The Worgens you met so far were nothing! Their commander is not far!” he yelled.
“The Worgens have commanders? I don’t think that mindless killing machines are commanded easily” Fizzikz said. Duriff giggled, and I smirked while looking at the Imp Fizzikz brought with him.
“As far as I noticed your Imp is also quite a mindless drone, burning everything in its way. Still, ye command it.”
“That is something completely different, because…” Fizzikz could not finish his reply, because we heard a deep, ferocious growl behind us. Slowly, the four of us turned around, and gazed into the eyes of a big, dark-furred Worgen.
“I warned you!” the human yelled.
“Meet my warden, Rethilgore!” We ignored this last sentence, for we were far too busy dodging the wild swings of this certain Rethilgore. I made sure to get his attention, and directed his attacks in such a way that I could parry them easily with my shield. Still, I could feel the impact of Rethilgore’s strikes, and had a difficult time to stand my ground. Ground! That’s it. I concentrated on the divine powers granted to me, and the floor started to glow in golden embers. Clearly, this was something the Worgen commander did not expect, and howled in pain as the divine light burned his feet.
“This is what you deserve, scum! I will make you bathe in the justice of the Light, wretched abomination!”
“Stop your chatter about your religion, Muffy” I heard from the back of the creature. It came from Razgrimm’s mouth, who was just plunging his swords into the back of Rethilgore. This would be the finishing strike for him, as the Worgen fell onto the floor, covered in dark, muddy blood.

“That was awe-inspiring, my friends!” It was that human again, and now we had the time to walk over to his cell.
“Finally someone came here to rescue me!” he said.
“Rescue you? We don’t even know you. And nowadays, I don’t trust random strangers in robes” Fizzikz replied, followed by an agreeing nod from Duriff.
“You have to! Arugal locked me up here as his next test subject! Please, help me!”
“What would ye do for us, lad?” Razgrimm asked, looking at the human quizzically.
“You are here to hunt Arugal, right? You cannot proceed without me, because the door to the courtyard is locked. Even Rethilgore does not have a key for it, but I know just the spell to open it!”
“So you are also a wizard, friend?” Fizzikz asked, this time in a more friendly way. I know how happy that little Gnome could be when he met someone who was into the arcane arts, or the demonic ways.
“Yes, yes! I even studied in Dalaran! But there is no time to just chat! Help me out of here by pulling that lever over there.”
“I don’t trust people who don’t even tell me there name” I said, still not trusting this fellow. These days, the world is full of dangerous magicians, and this could be one of them. But was I afraid of? I travel together with a Gnome who controls winged devils and creatures made of the Void itself!
“Ashcrombe. Sorcerer Ashcrombe is my name.” That did not sound like the name of an insane warlock to me. I nodded towards Duriff, who stood next to the lever. She pulled it down, and the cell opened. Ashcrombe sighed, and moved out.
“Follow me, friends. But move silent. Those Worgens hear almost everything!”

It was true, Ashcrombe brought us to a locked door. But with just a few gestures, he unlocked it. We thanked him, and he went for the exit of the keep. We, however, stepped through the door, just to look at a courtyard filled with not just Worgens and wolves. Amongst them were the ghosts and souls of the former inhabitants of this residence. Kitchen maidens, chefs and more! The four of us gulped, and we readied our blades and magic. This would be one wild ride…

Well, that’s it for now. Check back later, to read more about what happened in Shadowfang Keep. I promise you it will include explosions, emotions and endangered animal species. Well, not so sure ‘bout the last part. But still, make sure to return!

May the Light guide you,

Mugrimm Frostbrew.

Beer vs. Bear?

Did ye fellows ever discover the true meaning of life? Neither did I. But I and Razgrimm had quite the thrilling discussion ‘bout it last night while traveling towards the wicked castle known as Shadowfang Keep. We came to the conclusion that we did not know the meaning of life, but we knew what we would need to live: beer. So, we took another sip from our canteen, filled with some Thunderbrew, and moved on in laughter. Finally, we arrived at the gates of the cursed keep. The barking of the Worgen, down in the wretched village of Pyrewood filled the cool night air. Razgrimm pulled down his bandit mask in awe, and I sent a quick prayer to the Light, for it should protect our souls from harm. My brother drew his blades, a wicked grin adorning his face. I donned my shield, grabbed my axe, and both of us marched forward. Our eyes were filled with a cocktail of fear and courage, and so we entered the dark keep…
…just not yet! Just before we set foot in Shadowfang Keep, Razgrimm let out a surprised shout.
“Oi! Don’t you think we miss something, brother?!” he said, his voice muffled by the bandit mask.
“Don’t know whadya talking about, Raz. I got me gear, me beer and me devotion to the good in the world” I replied. Seriously, I could not recall anything we missed.
“Duriff! Fizzikz! We miss those two, you dumb Trogg!” That’s when it hit me! Indeed, Duriff and Fizzikz had sent word that they would join us in our adventure. Even though I consider myself quite the good fighter, my brains have as many holes as a good, old Dalaran Sharp. I slapped my own forehead, and grinned.
“Well then, let us wait for ‘em. How long ‘till they get here?”
“Duriff is having dinner with the rest of the Dwarvish Ladies Against Strip Mining League. And Fizzikz told me he is still looking for a gold-alloyed eyeball for some machine. Guess it will take some time before they are here” Razgrimm replied. I sighed and sheathed my weapon. I was just about to grab some ham from me back, when it hit me.
“Razgrimm, remember what we did during summer family meetings?”
“When the sun touched the peaks of Dun Morogh?” he answered.
“Exact! You think it is time for…”
“…Frostbrew Bear Wrestling!”

Now, the average Human or Elf does not know what Frostbrew Bear Wrestling is, but as I am quite the nice Dwarf, I will explain to you. The necessary equipment for participating in Frostbrew Bear Wrestling is equal to nothing but your undies (and your family or guild crest). Also, you need some bears roaming around to hunt. The participants set out to hunt those bears, and wrestle them into submission with their bare, naked hands! It is a game of wit, strength and quite some courage (or quite some foolishness – Fizzikz). Those who can bring the most bear claws to the judge after a set amount of time, win the Frostbrew Bear Wrestling and receive some kind of prize (most of the time, that “prize” is a visit at the local medic – Razgrimm).



Now, it should be obvious that we lacked a few things: more participants and a judge. We didn’t worry about prizes now: we just did it for the heck
of it! Razgrimm and I decided to do it all without additional participants, as the local population of Pyrewood Village did not seem to like our “invitation” to the event. And about the judge: we just ignored that part of the game. So we just went out into Silverpine Forest, and stalked the quite tough bears. Razgrimm, as a devoted thief, knew which position he preferred when fighting a bear. Just to give you a hint: it is NOT the position that could be mauled by some huge teeth.
After an hour of hunting and getting clawed by teddies, we decided to call it quits and tend our wounds. But first we had to find out who won the Frostbrew Bear Wrestling! As both of us killed an equal amount of bears, we had to do it the old way: a box fight! Atop of the bridge of Shadowfang Keep, Razgrimm and I battled like true heroes: no weapons, no armor, no “nifty tricks”. It was an epic battle, something even the heroes of our past would have considered “damn awesome”. But in the end, the Light was victorious. As I boasted about my victory, me brother already bandaged his wounds, and watched as Duriff and Fizzikz arrived at the Keep. Both of them looked quite shocked at two half-naked, mauled Dwarves. Razgrimm and I looked at each other, and laughed together as only brothers could. We almost forgot about our planned attack on Shadowfang Keep, was it not for the annoying voice of Fizzikz to remind us.

As we donned our armor and walked towards the keep’s gates, I kept looking down up the walls. Did something move up their? I certainly felt an evil presence behind those walls. Would this be the chance for the Undersized Heroes to prove their worth? Well, you can find out! Come back later, to read more about our adventures in Shadowfang Keep!

May the Light be with you,

Mugrimm.

Roll-call for the Heroes!

Being the only one of this bunch able to write proper (even after quite a few ales or a beating by a sweaty Ogre), I was charged with the task to write and report about the adventures and mishaps of a rag-tag band of Dwarves and Gnomes, united under the banner of the Undersized Heroes. An adventuring troupe, willing to show Azeroth (and other places) the courage, power and intelligence (or the lack of that –Fizzikz) of the races that are not so tall! Prepare for danger! Prepare for loot! Prepare for booze!

Alright, enough of this chatter about heroes and all. Let’s get down to business by introducing those epic-scale saviors (Like that drunken thief Razgrimm could be someone’s savior! –Duriff) that compose our band.

Let’s start off with the three very important Dwarves from the Frostbrew family: Mugrimm, Razgrimm and Duriff.

• Razgrimm is one wicked Dwarf. Lemme tell you that he started ripping people off in his childhood: stealing little trinkets from neighbor kids, earning money with dice games in Ironforge and even worse. Too bad that our parents were devote servants of the Light, and Razgrimm got a major smack whenever they heard of his mischievous behavior (And ofcourse it wasn’t you who told Mommy everytime! – Duriff). Luckily, the three of us moved out quite early, and Razgrimm used every chance to become even more skillful in his thievery. However, “it was always for the good” as he used to say. That was the only reason I, Mugrimm, tagged along with him. I hoped some of my devotion to the Light would swap over to him, but every time I wanted to teach him something about our tenets, he saw a pub and went swaggering there. He also lost his pony tail, a trademark of the Frostbrews, in a pub: after losing a bet against a Night Elf (it was about who could get the Dwarven lady Anya drunk and all wild first), he had to cut off his tail. Still ashamed for his loss against a pointy-eared tree hugger, he know seeks vengeance in fighting the evil of this world with the only thing that can really fight it: his own “evil” (as far as red-haired stumps can be evil – Mentalikz).

• Next off we have Duriff Frostbrew, the only remaining female offspring of the Frostbrew family. Just as me, Duriff turned to the clerics of the Light, to study it in all its facets. Yet, she also discovered that using the Light was one thing, but using the dark forces as a weapon from time to time was also quite effective. However, Duriff is a proud Dwarven lady, knowing that she can make a difference. If it wasn’t for her speech impediment, more people could understand her intriguing person.

• And then we have me, Mugrimm Frostbrew. Paladin apprentice, always seeking to spread the Light. Another personal goal of mine is turning my brother and sister to the true meaning of the Light (or at least what you consider as the “true” Light – Duriff), but that could take a few more adventures. Also, I’m an expert on the field of everything alcoholic, and if you ever want to chat up with me, then invite me to the next pub and serve me a few Thunderbrews. But don’t underestimate me: I might not be tall, and my hair might be red, but I’m a true son of Ironforge!

Undersized Heroes is also the home of a pair of wicked Gnomes: the warlock Fizzikz and the mage Mentalikz. Both of ‘em are anything but sane, but their demonic and arcane knowledge is more than useful in our adventures.

• Fizzikz is the wicked of the two, and has quite an obsession with everything related to demons. Some say he is so obsessed, that he does some crazy experiments with his Succubus. I hope, by the Light, that such rumors are anything but true. However, he is also an engineer, and we all know what happens when Gnomes go tweaking machines: they either work better than intended, or blow themselves up. Let’s hope for the former.

• And then we have Mentalikz. Mentalikz is a quiet little Gnome, but do not underestimate his potential of blowing stuff up. This little fellow does quite a fine job at it…and he is just getting started!

Well, so far about the Undersized Heroes. These pages will be filled with more interesting stories about us, and the best of all: it’s all public! So don’t just shove these notes away, read on, you scraggy son of a Trogg!

For now, Mugrimm the Paladin lays down his pencil.

May the Light guide you.